What do you do when you get $100 of vouchers for a store that has nothing that you want?

…or virtually nothing.

This happened to me. I won (as did each of my 3 team mates) $100 worth of vouchers for That CD Shop at a company offsite. A relatively young and small music chain with a handful of outlets. Great! I thought, I can go splash out on some great guitar music.

Sadly, whatever my tastes are (regular readers will know I tend towards metal, rock and decent guitar music more than anything else) the That CD Shop ethos is the exact opposite of what I want to buy. That CD Shop caters to people who don’t have any particular taste in music. I won’t say ‘no taste’ as this to me means they like gangsta rap, hip hop or drum ‘n’ bass. It means that they haven’t any idea what it is that they like, but know that they will need some CDs to put inside their CD players.  Alternatively they could be audiophiles – male nerds with a bit of disposable income (but the lack of imagination to spend it) who end up with massive compensatory tube-driven hi-fi kits that have nautilus-shaped speakers, silver core connecting cable (which emphasize a whole bunch of frequencies that humans can’t hear) and anechoic chambers devoted to listening to the half dozen discs they own, one of which is almost certainly Eagles Live*.

So, picture this store, whose stock is composed entirely of the sort of Middle Of the Road equipment testing music and you can soon see why it took me more than an hour to find *anything* that I wanted – even for effectively free with my $100 of vouchers…

To make matters worse, they insist on playing the most atrocious music very loud in the store and out into the street (if I had nothing better to do I would complain to the Environment Agency on the toxicity of the noise pollution), with some tracks being played over and over again. There was this one acoustic reggaed-up version of ‘Somewhere over the rainbow’ (originally a beautiful song in Wizard Of Oz) sung by some talentless falsetto bimbo with no vibrato to speak of which was just the most grating aural torture one could imagine. I actually asked the brainless store girl (acting as DJ too) who it was so I could see who was perpetrating these crimes.

I did see a Megadeth boxed set called Warchest. Kind of bizarre really, since they had three or four shelves devoted to box sets, but the others were stuff like Neil Diamond, Beach Boys, Beatles Eagles (yes), Crosby Stills and Nash and similar. And then there nestling in between is this Megadeth bullet-decorated box. For about 10 seconds I thought – “OK- I’m buying this!” except that I already had 99% of the tracks on there, plus it was only $80. The nurtured Singaporean instinct in me forced me to need to spend precisely $100 of my free vouchers, so with $20 short and no other disc that could make it up I began to sweat.

What else did the store have – let’s see… One Van Halen best of (got it). One Steve Vai Elusive Light and Sound (got it). One SRV In Step album (got it)…

So what did I end up with? Seasons 6 and 7 of the Simpsons. They also sold DVDs and these were the only ones they had worth buying (the rest were old classic movies that I can catch anytime on TCM channel). The Simpsons and Metal are natural bedfellows.

Price: $99.80.

*I do not own and never will own Eagles Live.

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One Response to “What do you do when you get $100 of vouchers for a store that has nothing that you want?”

  1. I was seriously rolling reading this post. haha I completely agree with the zombie followers of MTV and mainstream radio.

    They’ll never discover what those “other” discs are doing in the music store next to their Limp Bizkit albums.

    -Kyle

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